(Not) Dating

Since 2016 I have been on dating websites and apps but not had a single date or meeting. They’re seemingly full of people that I have no interest in, or they have no interest in me. There are some significant problems here. I’m not very willing to be flexible in some of my main criteria.
I’m not interested in someone that:

• has had kids – AT ALL (This currently still feels like an absolute and I don’t have to justify it.)
• wants kids
• looks much older than am
• looks uglier than I do (that’s a low enough bar already)
• seems like a rough “scratter”
• cakes themselves in makeup or tries to be too “glamorous”
• is significantly bigger than me
• lives too far away
• can’t string a sentence together or uses too much text-speak

Less critical, but also importantly, not someone that:

• is some sort of fitness and outdoor fanatic
• identifies strongly with any religion
• can’t travel to me as easily as I can to them
• has nothing discernibly interesting about them

There are very few women in my age range that haven’t pushed out sprogs. Even from the few that haven’t, they’d somehow have to like me as well. I’m less than ideal in many ways and there is no shortage of good looking men with better qualities out there. And I’m sure that a lot of my male competition would be looking for the same kinds of women that I do.
Even if I found this mythical woman, she’d probably soon realise that she can do much better than me for looks, wealth and other basic categories.
It’s very easy for people to say, well, you’ll have to be more open to people who’ve had children, or that you should find someone to like for how they are not how they look or whatever. No, that’s no good at all. I’m not looking for someone well out of my league but I have to at least not find them repulsive. Just because I’m not looking for someone off Baywatch, it doesn’t mean I have to accept someone off Crimewatch. Even if it means I am seen as shallow.
I don’t think I’m a very gregarious, charming or witty person and there’s not really very much about me other than a few projects from the past that make me very interesting.
I have no other means of meeting people as I can’t “pull” in the conventional sense and have never been able to. I’m a bit introverted anyway and for some parts of my life I have in one way or other been a bit of loner by not having that many friends. Especially nowadays.
This return to single-life was eventually going to happen again.
I suppose I was lucky to find myself in a position to get with my ex because I already knew her, liked her and her previous relationship was coming to an end. There won’t be any similar circumstances again so I have serious concerns about me find in a partner again. I’m just not like a lot of people that are able to. And I’m getting OLDER. I’m fussy and have little right to be and add that to the other problems I have in finding anyone and them liking me and that may very well add up to me spending the remainder of my life alone.

I haven’t given up hope entirely though.


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