Father Christmas
Why
In 2000 I bought a couple of feeble Santa outfits for just £6.99 each from Poundstretcher that me and friend were going to wear for a night out. I noted in my journal afterwards: “I wish I was Santa every week, or at least, were able to manage what Santa did for me every week. We were invincible. We were ultimately amiable.” In 2001, I wanted to do the same, but I decided to make them as the felt ones were utterly rubbish.
When
Made in 2001.
Elements
Jacket, trousers, belt. hat , beard, sack.
Amount of Work
Just sewing by hand, which did take quite a few hours for a jacket and trousers for two people.
Level of use
A good few occasions
Future use
Almost certainly.
Notes
i stencilled “FULL SACK” onto the back of the Body-builder belt used for this. I also came up with some phrases to use, but barely used any of them:
And what would you like for Christmas?
Have you been a good girl? (always a good answer in one way or another)
Would you like to help me empty my sack?
Ho ho ho, I only come once a year.
Ho ho ho, I should come more than once a year.
Would you like me to come down your chimney?
What kind of toys would you like for Christmas?
I’ve got a big bulging sack for you.
These were supplemented by colleagues with:
Do you like turkey love? Suck my cock its fowl
Can you help me find my reindeer?
Would you like to ride with me on my sleigh tonight?
Can you turn my baubles into flashing lights?
If you’ve got some crackers, ill provide the nuts.
Would you prefer sherry or brandy or just a stiff one?
I got 3m x 2m of red furry material and .5m x 2m (I think) of white furry material. There was some cream coloured stuff I saw afterwards that was far better and thicker. I probably won’t bother buying it, but as I wanted to keep this outfit for some years maybe I should consider it. Incidentally, I saw a few outfits on the internet, nothing really special. One was £10. Same shit as I had last year. Another was £275, and another was £380. I have no idea why as neither looked that great.
My dad had bought two Santa beards at £8 each and although it is a bit cumbersome and annoying it does generally look good.