Fizzle Bang Twats
What
A box and 22 firework labels.
(2 Wheels, 4 Rockets, 5 Roman Candles, 11 Fountains.)
When
October 2012
Origin Notes
A typically basic box of family fireworks.
Original vs Rude Pantry Version
| Original Product | Rude Pantry Product | |
| Parent Company | American Promotional Events, Inc | Rude Pantry |
| Brand | TNT | Bog Standard Fireworks |
| Product Name | Merlin Selection Box | Fizzle Bang Twats |
| Variety | Merlin | Fizzle Bang Twats |
| Dominant Theme | Brightly coloured firework names. | General swearing and crudeness |
| Barcode Numbers Spell | Unknown | 11 14 1 3 11 5 18 19 = KNACKERS |
| Barcode Scans As | Unknown | Bollocks! |
Comparison
Development & Detail
All the labels
Notes
The original new box name was “Clitoris Allsorts”, but I later changed it, as it didn’t work as well as “Fizzle Bang Twats”.
The full list of firework names:
SHIMMERING JISM
SPUNK SPRAY
RELEASED OTTERS
GOLDEN SHOWER
FOOTLONG FUCKER
THUNDER CUNT
MISSION TO YOUR ANUS
VOMIT FOUNTAIN
UBER TWAT
HAPPY ENDING
MEAT SEEKING PISSILE
SHIT STORM
CLUSTER FUCK
FROTHING GASH
CUNTYBOOBY
BARKING SPIDER
RUSTY SHERIFF’S BADGE
AERIAL BASTARD
SKY FART
PHALLIC SPURTER
CUNT BUSTER
HAEMORROID ATTACK
I made two sets of these. The first I gave to my then girlfriend’s brother as a birthday present as it was close to Bonfire Night.
I still have the unused second set. Also, I amended the labels to include Rude Pantry, as I had conceived of that in 2012.