I’ve made loads of random things over the years on the PC, but many of them are parts of other projects, feature people I don’t wish to think about, incomplete, weak or just things that didn’t occur tome to add to this page. Here are some random things I’ve pulled from my computer.
If I remember rightly, the only reason for making this composite image of my face replacing that of the much better looking Jude Law (as Doctor Watson) was that I enjoyed the Sherlock films a lot. (2011)
For this poster I replaced Wall-E with my dog Jelly. Not for any particular reason. Later, It was going to feature as an advert in a spoof “Heat” magazine I was doing of stuff me and my girlfriend were up to. However, thinking up content for even just one intended edition was too difficult. (2008)
I made this the day before my 40th birthday. I basically just took a something on a plate on my table, then me on table with a lit candle in mouth. Then buggered about in Photoshop to make my head into a deeply unappetising “cake”. (2014)
I can’t quite recall why, but I photoshopped my friend Adele’s face onto the body of Harley Quinn. It worked really well. (2020)
Comparing photos of my dad and I with moustaches and in police tunics 30 years apart when he was about 34 and I was 38. (2012)
I made this based on a joke from the 2001 TV series “The Armando Iannucci Shows”. (2006)
A fairly simple spoof of the Covid messages from the buffoon Boris. I put this up in a local community notice board. It didn’t last long. (2021)
A photo taken at my TARDIS party in 2005, but a few months later adapted to look sepia and replace things in my living room with Nazi artwork. N.B. I’m not a Nazi sympathiser, I just thought it would be interesting to do. (2006)
Me as the “Girl with Pearl Earring”. Abandoned calendar theme. (2020)
Me as King Alfred. Abandoned calendar theme. (2019)
Me as King Arthur. Abandoned calendar theme. (2019)
Me as King Cnut. Abandoned calendar theme. (2019)
Apart from fixing a couple of things, this 2007 photo of a hotdog in a bottle of cider was taken almost exactly as it is seen here. Some years later I needed to replace the canvas on my shed and I chose this peculiar but strangely pleasing image. (2015)
This is the only thing I have to show for the first website I created. It wasn’t very good, was never finished. It had a fair amount of content but only a tiny fraction of what this one has. It still took a lot of work and was quite an achievement at the time though. (2000)
I think I was asked to do this for someone via a friend because one of them thought I enjoyed doing this kind of thing for fun. Not really. I wanted paying if I didn’t know the person it was for. If I got anything at all, it wasn’t worth it. (2010)
I made this flyer for a friend that was starting a nail and beauty sideline. (2012)
I was inspired to make this based on the adverts for selling “old gold”. Who sold Gold like it was somehow out of date? Sadly, no-one had any old narcotics they wanted to offload to me for a bargain price. (2019)
Although I’d replaced Carole Hersee’s face with my own on a testcard found online much earlier, I decided that I HAD to accurately recreate the entire test card in pristine vector-based graphics. This was despite not needing to for any purpose whatsoever. It was not quick or easy. (2019)
This was just an inverted and vectorised image of a scribble added to a cool background I found online. Although I didn’t create either original parts, I still consider this my creation. I framed this and put it in my hall for a while. (2006)
I was inspired to make a slim person fat by a promotional graphic at a printing industry convention in about 1994. I can’t recall why I used my friend Jo though. It may just have been because she was slim and it was a full height suitable pose. I think it turned out quite well for a first attempt. (2003)
I wanted to see if I could create something that would on one hand would chime with people but on the other wouldn’t be something they’d be likely to share. I mean, everyone likes to think they’re sophisticated, and everyone enjoys having a big dump, but it would be even less likely for a woman, let alone a sophisticated one to openly acknowledge and share this. (2014)
This was a follow up to the previous image, to see if this would be liked or shared compared to a female based one. It was neither liked nor shared as far as I recall. Both of these images were composites from different things as the main toilet use images were quite different. (2014)
I made this jokey “business card” for my holiday with my brother. We never gave them out, but they were quite amusing. (Originally 2002)
I borrowed this idea for a card to present to people from a design book I saw in 1996. I did print some, but I never gave them out. (2002)
A Christmas card. I thought it was quite amusing to have some kid opening a load of porn-based presents and just found images online to make that. (2005)
Anothyer Christmas card. I made this but at the time it was so difficult to find a suitable picture of a crapping dog that I ended up using a dingo or hyena or something and hoped no-one would notice. (2005)
Prostitute card 1. I made these for my telephone box. I cartoonised and feminised my younger face for this.
Prostitute card 2 The telephone number is from a range resrved for film and TV production use, so has never worked and never will.
Prostitute card 3 Repurposedmy face from Nice magazine again from when I was 18.
Prostitute card 4
Prostitute card 5 Repurposed image from the retro advert calendar. A&O levels mean anal and oral in this context.
Prostitute card 6 My face here is from when I was about 19.
